A Whole New Set of Lies.   4 comments

Well, more, or less.

Being that I am something of a storyteller, I have a bad habit of mixing truth with lies and leaving it up to you to figure out which is which.

Since my dear friend, Dawn, of Write Away fame, has gotten me embroiled in another meme… hang on to your BS meters, kiddies… here we go again!

Are you a rutabaga?

No. I am a meat Popsicle.

When was the last time you ate lion meat?

A gentleman never tells. Suffice to say our high school mascot was the lions. (I know… TMI… but, I’m feelin’ ornery today.)

Upload a heartwarming picture of something that makes you smile.

Damnit… I’m on dial up you sadists! But, here goes. I’ll be back in an hour, or so.

Sorry… didn’t work. It was a pic of my wife, but Facebook won’t let the thing get linked to.

If you could go back in time and kick the crap out of someone, who would it be?

The idiot who invented legal theft… I mean taxes.

Name one habit that makes other people plot your demise.

Being a total smartass… but, it’s better than being a dumb one. 😉

What song would you like to be playing while you are kicking the crap out of someone?

Nickleback: Next Contestant. (Probably for the same reason. LOL! BTW. To the person who started this meme… violent sucker, ain’t ya?)

Where da muffin top at?

Innuendo is one thing, but the censors won’t let me answer this one outright. Maybe on a porn site, but not here. 😛

How many goats, stacked atop one another like Yertle’s Turtles, would it take to reach the moon?

Damned if I know… I didn’t read Dr. Seuss as a kid. (Didn’t watch Mr. Rogers, either. Both of those kiddie icons gave me the willies.)

Describe yourself using obscure Latin words.

Instictuas authorius wantabeus.

That has to be pretty obscure, since I made it all up, like the pseudo Latin they used in the roadrunner cartoons.

Why does evil exist?

So the Gods won’t get bored. (Hey, would you actually like eternity in Care Bear land?) **shudder**

What the fuck are you thinking right now?

What the fuck am I doing this for?

If you could decide whose face should go on the money, who would you pick?

No one. I’d prefer pictures of bare rear ends on the money. Mostly because in a complete economic collapse that’s about the only thing that worthless paper will be good for. (See Germany’s collapse before Hitler if you don’t believe me.)

If you had to pick between a pet squirrel and a pet iguana, which would you choose?

Honestly neither. I prefer boa constrictors like Alice Cooper. But if I had to choose… the iguana. No fleas to infest the whole house.

Tag blogger some friends, whatever random number that suits you. (My random number is 2.) Ha! You can’t say “no tagbacks” because I just made up new rules! BOO YAH. Make up your own rules or be enslaved by another blogger’s.(<–these are actually Michelle Simkin’s rules, but I like them as well, so they still apply. besides, I'm a lazy cuss and I've been copy/pasting these suckers.) 😛

1. Dean C. Rich

2. Riley Redgate

Pick a funny nickname for number 1.

Ellie May Clampett’s new critter! 😉 😀

Number 2 dreams about…

Reaching the age of 21, so she can get plastered whenever she wants to.

Number 3 looks like…

Claude Reins…since there isn’t a number three. Boo Yah!

Since this is the only meme I got tagged with… Th-th-th- that’s all folks!

(Now can I plot revenge on Dawn? Huh, can I, huh? Can I, can I, can I?) 😀 ( Ya know I luv ya, Sweetie.) 😉



Posted July 20, 2011 by Peter Burton in Uncategorized

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4 responses to “A Whole New Set of Lies.

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  1. I got tagged in one of her meme’s too. We need to sign her up for some kind of a 12-step program. 😛

    • Good evening folks. My name is, (Dawn, or Michelle…you pick), and I’m a compulsive memer.

      Crowd: “Welcome, (whoever), take your time we’ve all been there.” 😛

      *I really don’t mind, to be honest, Darke… It’s one less post i have to come up with all on my onesises,. and it gives me yet another opportunity to be a total smartass without really hurting anyone. Except myself, that is 😀 😉

  2. Guys it could be worse…I still have another one (or two, or three, I forget) to do….blame Slinky– Michelle Simkins for starting all this!!! But at least I am getting to know you guys later! LOVE YA, PETE! No revenge….I’ll sick my leeches on ya!

    • Ooooo! I like leeches… especially with holendaze sauce! 😉

      You know I don’t really mind, Sweetie.

      I adore the chance to mess with a few heads, and see who is dumb enough to take me seriously. 😉

      As Frankenfurter said, “It’s somethin’ ya’all get use to. A mental mindfuck can be nice.” 😀

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